Random rambling

This is stupid. But okay, I’m stupid. Deal with it.

1. Who are you named after? My paternal grandmother. Though I did change part of it. I kept the relevant part.
2. Last time you cried? Today on the way home from work. From loneliness.
3. Do you like your handwriting? Yes.
4. What is your favorite lunch meat? Head Cheese (yes, really. Sorry.)
5. Favorite cheese? Probably Gruyere, but any cheese will do.
6. What’s your longest relationship? 22 yrs of mostly hell.
7. Do you still have your tonsils? Yes.
8. Would you bungee jump? Definitely, if I were within the weight limit.
9. What is your favorite kind of cereal? Cheerios. Or oatmeal.
10. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? No
11. Do you think you’re strong? Emotionally, spiritually, mentally, yes. But not physically any more.
12. Favorite ice cream? Mostly fond of sorbet. Pistachio comes to mind, though. Ben and Jerry’s anything, too.
13. What is the first thing you notice about someone? Gender.
14. Football or Baseball? Baseball, but not really a sports fan at all.
15. What color pants are you wearing? Sorry, naked as a jaybird presently. Well, you asked, didn’t you.
16. Last thing you ate? Can’t remember. Probably a sandwich.
17. What are you listening to? The singing dark.
19. Favorite smell? Shalimar perfume or a lover’s hair.
20. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? My son, probably. Or some client or other.
21. Hair color? Grey and brown.
22. Eye color? Dark chocolate brown.
23. Favorite Food? Probably Pho with tendon and tripe. But I do love fancy food.
24. Scary movies or happy? Happy.
25. Last Movie you watched? Can’t remember. Maybe Sausage Party on Netflix.
26. What color shirt are you wearing? See #15.
27. Favorite holiday? Holidays suck when you’re alone. Thanks for asking. Blow me.
28. Night owl or morning person? Night owl with a vengeance.


Religious Controversy

I’m not going to go into it all right now, because I have one foot out the door and the other under the desk, and I’m starting to develop a cramp.  So I’ll stick to the basics and round it out later, when I get tired of wasting my time dicking around elsewhere.

I was born into a religious household.  Christian of some sort, but I’m not sure what denomination, because the whole family joined the Episcopalian church and I was baptized at the same time when I was about 7 1/2 years old.

I never liked it.  I would join the choir purely to have extra singing time (I’m a lyric soprano) and so I could stay awake.  Later, I married a Lutheran and eventually joined that church.  They hymns were better, but they make you hug them midway into the service, and I hated that.

In my early 30s, I became a Pagan.  Mainly what’s called a hedge-witch, which I still am, even though I don’t believe in deities any more.  Not sure I did back then, either, but there you go.

Now, I consider myself an atheist, because I’ve actually read the bible and I can’t believe I was going along with all that perverted shit for so long.  Fair warning: if you are a Christian and you try to defend your faith here, your comment will not be approved.

It’s very hard to shake off a lifetime of being enmeshed with religion, but I’ve made lots of changes in my life, and changes take time.

So I’m taking time, but I am pretty sure coming out the other side, I will be free from that particular bondage. 

Okay–it’s Friday and time to Party.  Have a great weekend.

Boston Marathon Fiasco, 2013

Here’s something I posted on Facebook a little while ago and thought I’d save it here.


“I thought I’d like to mention that I have a very dear friend who is a Muslim. She’s one of the sweetest, most sensitive people I know. I’ve seen her covertly bullied by a supervisor for nothing more than her religion. 

A lot of my neighbors are Muslims. They’re the quiet, polite ones I’m glad are around me. Many of them are in this country because they had to escape from the Taliban. None of them are terrorists. None Of Them Are Terrorists. 

There are crazy fundamentalists in just about every religion; it’s not which religion that’s at fault–it’s religion in general. Religion divides people. It creates an Us group and a Them group. Religion is the cause of haters. I’m sorry to say that to the good, kind Religious people I know, but look around you and read the passages in your holy books that you don’t want to think about. I know good people reject them while purporting to follow their particular god’s “word”. Be honest. If it’s messed up, it’s messed up.

So quit pointing the finger. Just stop it now. Some people who were coincidentally Muslims did horrific deeds. Christians and Jews have done them, too, at various times and in various places. It’s time to talk about individual responsibility, not about rounding up groups of people who haven’t actually done anything wrong. Let go of the idea that you’ll be safe if only you could identify and eradicate some group or other. Back when I had a religion, nothing could have induced me to harm anybody in its name, and I know the largest percentage of people with a religion feel the same way.

If somebody wants to be cruel and horrible, religion is a convenient excuse and nothing more. Cut It Out.”

I thought this blog was incredibly powerful, and it pointed something out to me: I had been using that wife, sister, daughter thing to try to push people into some sort of proto-empathy though something about it bothered me. This blog defines exactly what it was that I didn’t like. It may be harder to get the point across about the humanity of women and girls, but I will never use it again. Thank you. What a great essay.

The Belle Jar

I don’t have to tell you that Steubenville is all over the news.

I don’t have to tell you that it’s a fucking joke that Trent Mays and Ma’lik Richmond, the two teenagers convicted of raping a sixteen year old girl, were only sentenced to a combined three years in juvenile prison. Each will serve a year for the rape itself; Mays will serve an additional year for “illegal use of a minor in nudity-oriented material.”

I probably don’t even have to tell you that the media treatment of this trial has been a perfect, if utterly sickening, example of rape culture, with its focus on how difficult and painful this event has been for the rapists who raped a sixteen year old girl then bragged about it on social media.

And I almost certainly don’t have to tell you that the world is full of seemingly nice, normal…

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Gun control?

Just a few words about the gun control controversy.  I was watching Bill Maher on his 11th season premier last night and I was trying to sort out why countries who allow guns, and countries who don’t allow guns seem to have so relatively few instances of horrifying gun violence the way we have it in the United States.

One big difference between the United States and most other places, and this is going to sound a little weird, is that we were founded on Puritan principles and have perverted that particular belief system to mean that Sex Is Never Okay.  Follow me here, now.  Also, we have a huge advertising industry dedicated to making us unhappy with our bodies and in a constant state of anxiety about our bodies.  Men and women both bear the brunt of this kind of manipulation and it comes out in different ways: Women are encouraged, very strongly, to be thin, elegant, well-groomed, and to have specific kinds of attractiveness, no matter what their biological heritage may be; men are encouraged to look a certain way and to be sexually potent, with huge genitals and an ever-ready attitude.  They are expected to be the sole initiators of sexual activity and must be ready, willing, and able at the drop of a hat.  So everybody is left feeling inadequate.

Think about the way people feel about their weapons, and the words they use to describe them, and about the way they feel about their genitals, their sexuality, and who they are in relation to the opposite sex, and how they describe all that.  Notice a connection?  Guns are always hard, always ready, and the biggest, baddest guns can go and go and go, forever, with only brief periods of reloading.

It’s sick, yeah, but isn’t it possible that the biggest gun-manufacturing country in the world has a population who has caught that particular illness and personalized it?  So, two of the big differences between the US and other countries: unlimited guns, very much limited and inhibited sex.

I’m wondering if maybe I’m onto something here,  I doubt very much that anybody but me will ever read these words, but if somebody actually sees what I’ve said, feel free to comment, unless you’re a troll.  I warn all trolls ahead of time: a.) I don’t want your guns, and b.) I don’t feed trolls, so don’t expect a lot of conversation about this if you’re rude and stupid.

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